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NO BROWSING™ · RUDE T-SHIRTS
AT WORK
Shirts for the job that pays you to be polite. The shirt is not on payroll, so it can say it.
Your Urgency Sounds Like a You Problem.
$25.95
Act Your Wage. I Am.
$25.95
Left The House For This
$25.95
Motivation Loading
$25.95
Not Our Priority
$25.95
Off the Clock
$25.95
Quick Question.
$25.95
Shut Up. Check Out.
$25.95
What a sarcastic work shirt actually says
Every design on this shelf started as a sentence somebody typed into a work chat, read back, and replaced with “sounds good.” QUICK QUESTION. is the meeting that skipped the invite and found you anyway. ACT YOUR WAGE. I AM. is a performance review of the salary, not the person. OFF THE CLOCK is a time card that has stopped negotiating, and it swears. NOT OUR PRIORITY and SHUT UP. CHECK OUT. come from the other side of the counter, for anyone who has ever smiled at a stranger for money. BE WORSE corrects the poster. The payday ones moved to MONEY, which is where payday lives.
Nothing here names an employer, an industry or a manager. The joke is about the job. Everyone has one.
Who wears funny work shirts
People who answer emails with “per my last email.” People who left the house, travelled forty minutes and opened a laptop they could have opened in bed. Nurses on a day off. Baristas, receptionists, anyone in retail between November and January. And the person you’re buying for: the colleague who says “quick question” and takes your lunch hour, or the friend whose whole personality is a countdown to Friday.
A sarcastic work shirt is a safe gift because it roasts the job, not the person wearing it. They get to be the one who’s in on it. If it’s for an office gift exchange, Funny Christmas Gifts for Coworkers ranks this shelf by how much HR each one survives.
How to pick one
Decide where it’s going to be worn. On a weekend, anything here works. In the office, pick by how your HR reads. QUICK QUESTION., NOT OUR PRIORITY and LEFT THE HOUSE FOR THIS read as a joke about work and get a laugh in most buildings. ACT YOUR WAGE. I AM. and YOUR URGENCY SOUNDS LIKE A YOU PROBLEM. depend on whether your manager has a sense of humour, and you already know the answer. OFF THE CLOCK opens with a swear word, so it’s a Friday-drinks shirt, not a Monday-meeting one. BE WORSE has a small smiling demon on it. Read the room.
Then pick the colour. Each design comes in a dark set or a light set, chosen so the line stays readable from across an open-plan office, which is where it will be read.
Sizing, delivery, exchanges
Sizes run XS to 5XL on a standard unisex fit: a 38 to 41 inch chest is an M, 42 to 45 is an L, 46 to 49 is an XL. The size guide on every product page has the laid-flat width and length in inches and centimetres. Measure a shirt you already like, laid flat, armpit to armpit, and match it. XS to XL are the listed price; 2XL and up cost a little more, and the price updates on the size chip before you add it.
Shipping is free on every order. US orders usually arrive in about 5 to 10 business days; the EU, UK and Canada in about 6 to 12. Every shirt is made after you order it, so it can’t come back for a change of mind or a wrong size. If it arrives damaged, defective or wrong, email support within 30 days of delivery and it’s replaced or refunded, free. The full rules are on the returns page.
Questions people ask
Can I wear a sarcastic shirt to work?
Depends on the workplace, and you know yours. The quieter ones (QUICK QUESTION., NOT OUR PRIORITY, LEFT THE HOUSE FOR THIS) are a joke about the job and land in most offices. The sharper ones are for Friday drinks, the commute and the weekend. None of them names a company or a person.
Is a funny work shirt a good gift for a coworker?
Yes, with one rule: match the shirt to the behaviour, not the person. QUICK QUESTION. for the one who has never once asked a quick question. OFF THE CLOCK for the one who is out the door at 4:59 and doesn’t mind a swear word. They get to be in on it, which is the whole point of a gift like this.
What size should I order for someone else?
Ask, if you can. If you can’t, check the tag on a tee they already wear and go with that letter; ours is a standard unisex fit. Between sizes, size up. A roomy tee gets worn. A tight one gets donated.
What are the shirts made of?
100% combed ring-spun cotton (the heather colours blend in a little polyester; that flecked look doesn’t happen on its own), around 4.2 oz, a light everyday weight. The materials and care facts are on every product page.