Account 0 (embarrassing.)

NO BROWSING • YES, WE ARE OPEN. UNFORTUNATELY. • IT'S A SHIRT. NOT A MORTGAGE. • NOTHING HERE GETS CHEAPER IF YOU WAIT • NO BROWSING • YES, WE ARE OPEN. UNFORTUNATELY. • IT'S A SHIRT. NOT A MORTGAGE. • NOTHING HERE GETS CHEAPER IF YOU WAIT • NO BROWSING • YES, WE ARE OPEN. UNFORTUNATELY. • IT'S A SHIRT. NOT A MORTGAGE. • NOTHING HERE GETS CHEAPER IF YOU WAIT • NO BROWSING • YES, WE ARE OPEN. UNFORTUNATELY. • IT'S A SHIRT. NOT A MORTGAGE. • NOTHING HERE GETS CHEAPER IF YOU WAIT • NO BROWSING • YES, WE ARE OPEN. UNFORTUNATELY. • IT'S A SHIRT. NOT A MORTGAGE. • NOTHING HERE GETS CHEAPER IF YOU WAIT • NO BROWSING • YES, WE ARE OPEN. UNFORTUNATELY. • IT'S A SHIRT. NOT A MORTGAGE. • NOTHING HERE GETS CHEAPER IF YOU WAIT • NO BROWSING • YES, WE ARE OPEN. UNFORTUNATELY. • IT'S A SHIRT. NOT A MORTGAGE. • NOTHING HERE GETS CHEAPER IF YOU WAIT • NO BROWSING • YES, WE ARE OPEN. UNFORTUNATELY. • IT'S A SHIRT. NOT A MORTGAGE. • NOTHING HERE GETS CHEAPER IF YOU WAIT • NO BROWSING • YES, WE ARE OPEN. UNFORTUNATELY. • IT'S A SHIRT. NOT A MORTGAGE. • NOTHING HERE GETS CHEAPER IF YOU WAIT • NO BROWSING • YES, WE ARE OPEN. UNFORTUNATELY. • IT'S A SHIRT. NOT A MORTGAGE. • NOTHING HERE GETS CHEAPER IF YOU WAIT •

Faded Coal oversized t-shirt with the Certified Gym Rodent design, photo 1 of 6

Certified Gym Rodent

Lives at the gym. Probably has a key.

A frowning gray mouse in a little vest stands on a barbell above CERTIFIED GYM RODENT. in small typewriter capitals across the back. You're there before opening and still there when the cleaners arrive. Your family has stopped asking where you are.

$39.95

Color

Faded Coal

Size

Get it right the first time

Don’t guess. Go find a oversized t-shirt you already like the fit of and measure that one.

Size chart: oversized t-shirt measurements, in inches
Size	Lengthinches	Sleeve Lengthinches	Widthinches
XS	–	–	–
S	27.76″	9.06″	20.08″
M	29.13″	9.45″	21.65″
L	30.51″	9.45″	23.23″
XL	31.89″	10.24″	24.80″
2XL	33.27″	10.63″	26.38″
3XL	34.06″	11.02″	27.95″

How to measure. These are the oversized t-shirt itself, laid flat. Lay one that already fits on a table, measure the same spots, and compare.

Free shipping. Everywhere.
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Made to order, just for you
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Damaged or wrong? We fix it free.
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Checkout's locked down

Saving is just buying, later. And later never comes, does it.

WHAT YOU’RE ACTUALLY WEARING

Fabric: 100% carded cotton, garment-dyed and pre-shrunk. That’s where the faded look comes from.
Weight: 7.1 oz. Noticeably heavier than our regular tee.
Fit: Boxy and oversized, with dropped shoulders. It’s supposed to look big.
Built: Wide neck ribbing and a tear-away label.
The feel: The design lives in the fabric, not stuck on top of it. Soft the second you put it on, still soft after the tenth wash. No stiff plastic patch cracking and peeling off like the cheap stuff. Yours, and it stays that way.

WHEN IT SHOWS UP (SOONER IF YOU’D COMMIT)

USA: About a week. Two if it’s busy. Quick, for something worth the wait.
Canada: About 1–2 weeks. Ships from the US.
Europe: About 1–2 weeks. Made in the EU, so no customs and no surprise fees.
Everywhere else: About 2–4 weeks. Customs does what customs wants. So do you, apparently, standing here.
Shipping: Free. Everywhere. Don’t make it weird.

Estimates, not promises. The truck answers to no one. Full terms if you’re the reading type: Shipping & delivery.

YOU'LL PROBABLY IGNORE THESE TOO.

People who stalled on this stalled on these. Add them to the cart. Abandon them together.